Journal entry: 2 things I've learnt from getting lost in KL

By: Punk Chopsticks on 10:49 PM

Share it Please

Tweet

The job

"Clarissa!" A month ago, Nelly the head of HR called me from PJ - I was walking through Gurney Plaza wondering if I really wanted to blow 20 bucks on sushi when my phone started ringing.

"What?!"

"I just got a call from the editorial department!" She ended each sentence with an exclamation mark. "They have one extra slot for internship!"

"Cool!" I got caught up in her enthusiasm. "Where?!"

"R.age! So now you have two options - HR and editorial! Which one do you want?!"

I gave a pause long enough to be considerate, but short enough to not to sound like the line was dead "R.age, if you don't mind!"

I have friends working in HR. No sign has been heard or seen from any of them. We still post up flyers every now and again.

The jam

I woke up at 6 in the morning, giving myself one hour to get ready and two to get lost.  Then I stepped out, got on my bike, and

Got in line.

Boom

I used to think the jams in Penang were bad - and they were, sorta. But *KL jams are a whole other ball game. It's like that one day ever year when McDonalds has its annual Breakfast Day free breakfast giveaway and you wake up at 5 just to get a good spot and then you see the HUGE line spilling out onto the roads with people looking like they're ready to tears limbs for a McMuffin and you think to yourself

"Fuck this"

Just fuck it

Except in *KL you can't say "fuck this". You either get in line or you get the fuck out.

This is she

Thankfully I've got Mio, my trusty scooter to carry me through the jam to reach the first highway which Sam had scribbled down for me the night before. 

*

We were sitting at a table in Starbucks.

"So, from the Federal highway," He started.

"I thought I had to use the Persekutuan highway" 

Sam paused long enough to give me the biggest bitch face I've ever seen.

"They're both the same thing Clarissa."

"Oh." Oh.

He rolled his eyes "You're going to see one ramp - DON'T TAKE IT - and then another one - DON'T TAKE THAT EITHER - until you see the University hospital to your left and there's an overhead bridge - but you can't access it - then you'll have to exit left and go up - not down..."

I nodded blankly trying to keep my eyes straight and look focused whilst actually processing the flood of directions.

*

I wouldn't exactly call what happened to me getting lost per se. But on a more technical level, this is what more routes to work look like:

And this is what my route ended up looking like:

So. Yeah.

There are two lesson's I've gleaned out of this:

1. A two hour leeway for 10 kilometers worth of travel in *KL is NOT ludicrous. and
2. Motorcycle lanes are terrifying but a necessity I'll learn to live with. Also, they make me feel like I'm in a Need For Speed map what with all the cool underground tunnels and bypasses. 

*My sources tell me that No Clarissa, you can't just call PJ, Damansara, Bansar, Subang and all nearby cities "KL" God. It's like you just came out of a cave